Stuff I Know #19--The Meaning of a Day

DISCLAIMER: So I composed this post last week and now I'm going to have to walk part of it back, because my husband was very efficient and got his critter early and came home yesterday. So part of this rant post isn't really applicable any more. That said, I totally believe in the fundamental principle I talked about, so I'm going to post it in it's original form. Just know my husband worked hard to get home so he could spend our anniversary with me, which I really appreciate. Last week, I wasn't feeling so appreciative, and it resulted in this post. Boys, take note.

Today is my 38th wedding anniversary. 38 years ago I married my high school sweetheart. Until the day I die, I will maintain that it's the best decision I've ever made for my family, bar none. Now you may wonder why this qualifies as a Stuff I Know post. I'll get to that. But first I'm going to remind everyone that my opinions are my own, and the reason I blog is two-fold....as a form of family history, and as a way to keep my kids and grandkids connected. Sort of a clearing house of information about what's going on so that everyone kind of knows the high points of what everyone else in the family is doing. I don't really want to influence anyone but my own family, but if you enjoy the ramblings here, then that's just a bonus.

Here are my husband and I as seniors in high school at the Prom. Weren't we cute? And look....see? My hair WAS the same color as my red-headed children. I have photographic proof. And my husband had hair. Ah, the memories.

 Alright, getting to the nitty-gritty, and I will say right up front that this post is focused directly at my sons, including my son-in-law.

So, my husband has chosen to take this week and go hunting in another state. Yes, he has. It was the only week this particular tag was available, he says. And I'm feeling just the tiniest bit fragile around the edges about the whole situation, because Stuff I Know #19 is...There are meaningful days. See for me, and I'm taking a big leap here and generalizing it to include most women...my high school English teacher would call this a "glittering generalization" and she hated them. She wanted specifics in an essay. Anyway, the generalization I'm making for my boys is that for most women, there are a couple, three days a year that are special and important. Things like birthdays, and anniversaries, and Mother's Day mean something to females...in general. And when we want to be with a specific person on a specific day, and our perception is that an elk has taken priority, we might feel just a little tender about that. Boys, this is Female 101. I'm handing you a manual here. The bottom line is that I miss him and wish he was here, and to be fair, he did suggest that I drive to the other state on our anniversary and join him for dinner in camp and then drive home, but I chose to take a pass.

Now, I'm perfectly aware that my husband loves me and that he is glad he married me most days. I am sure that at some point today I'm going to receive a beautiful bouquet of roses that he's thought about and arranged to have delivered. It's not like that one time he forgot our anniversary...and it was only that one time.  He's a wonderful man, and I love him dearly, and when I'm wearing my big girl pants, I fully realize that my marriage is not really about a specific day. It's about the 38 years of work we have done together to raise a family and work on our relationship....and it is work, even after 38 years. I get that, and I truly believe it....when I'm wearing my big girl pants.

But some days it's harder than others to find them. So my boys, if you have a choice between the day or not the day for some kind of optional activity, especially if you have maybe engaged in that activity quite a lot recently, and over the course of the year, always err on the side of the day. Just keep it in mind for future reference.  You're welcome.

Comments

[Pam]

Happy Anniversary!

[Joyce D]

Happy anniversary! Glad he got back early. Good lesson for all! Hugs.

[AP Man]

Haha, I think nothing builds bonds and strengthens ties so much as the joy of gutting an elk together. How come you didn't go along! Perfect anniversary date...

[AP Man]

BTW, thanks for getting married that one time! It sure has turned out great for all of us! Good call, Ma and Dad!